Do you remember my friend Greg? He’s the one with the home cinema I mentioned a few posts ago. He called me last week to see if I wanted to hang out with him and his friend from out of town and knock back a few beers. A chance to have “guy time” is a rare treat for me, since Julia and I are both working full-time now.
As it turns out, it was the most boring night of my life.
I get to Greg’s house and knock on the door. The door opens and I am greeted by a man who has a strange likeness to Crocodile Dundee. He had the tan, he had the accent and he was charming, his name was Paul. He invited me in and we made small chit chat as we headed to the cinema where Greg was already seated.
The game was on and the min-fridge was stocked with imported beers. Greg’s wife, Cindy, had made us game time snacks, and the evening appeared to be heading in a great direction. Beer, friends, snacks, and football, what more could a man ask for.
I made myself at home in one of the over-sized theater chairs and we began to watch the game. We explained the nuances of American football with Paul and we were all enjoying ourselves. It turned out that Paul owned a company in Sydney, Australia. The night was going well.
Oddly, the more beers that Paul drank the less charming he became. It didn’t really matter to me because the game was on and I could drowned out Paul and Greg’s business talk. But then, the game was over. I had nothing to do except join in their conversation or watch Unforgettable, but there was no way I could pull off proper interest in that.
Once Paul noticed I was listening he decided to give me some background into his company. Did you know Paul’s company started in 1998? Now you do. Did you know that Paul’s company is the leading producer of weird gadgety things in the world? You didn’t? How could you not, gadgety things are everywhere! Ugh, it was getting difficult to listen to.
Paul keep droning on and on about his business, and I felt my eyelids getting tired. As it turns out, Paul is trying to sell his gadgety thing business, and is looking for a proper business valuation in Sydney. He’s tried this one company, Key Property Group, and insisted that they were all drunks and thieves becaus of the low valuation they gave him, until he also tried Valuator and they gave him the same valuation…
The only reason I’ve ever heard those terms before is from watching Shark Tank. He talked about it as if I should know all the people who do valuations in Sydney. As if I was going to make a living off of my pretend widget venture. By the way, if I did have a widget company I would name it, “Wacky, Wonderful, Widget World.”
It was getting late so I excused myself from the conversation under the ruse of an early morning the next day. As I was leaving I walked through the kitchen where Cindy was to thank her for the delicious food that she made. She looked at me with a sly smile and asked if Paul was talking about his business again. I told her he was. She just rolled her eyes and assured me he was going back home on Friday.